I make a mess pouring myself a bowl of Wheaties in the morning. You would think I’d know better than to agree to paint an indoor mural… Unsupervised. Nevertheless, I persisted. These are four things I learned while painting my indoor mural.
- KNOW THYSELF
I’ve always had an inkling I was a messy man. Before beginning the project, I should’ve taken a good hard look at myself and said: “You sure you can do this without redecoration twelve hundred square feet of polished stone flooring.” If I had taken the time to ask the hard questions, I would’ve probably hopped in my jeep and drove to the hardware store for a mega-sized tarp.
- DONT GET EMOTIONALLY ATTACHED TO THE MODEL
Look, I get it. My puppy (She’s actually an old doggo, but she appreciates the compliment when I call her a puppy) is adorable. But I thought I could remain a professional and not pause every 3.483 seconds to give her a belly rub and ask “whose a good girl?” Spoilers… She is and I did. I spent the majority of my time hanging out with the model rather than painting her. Boy, am I a sucker or what.
- HEIGHTS SHOULDN’T SCARE YOU
If they do, maybe don’t get on the scaffolding. Easy enough. Or have a beer beforehand to build liquid courage!
- DONT HAVE A BEER BEFOREHAND TO BUILD LIQUID COURAGE
Right. So the beer SEEMED like a novel idea, but really it was disastrous. You’ll undoubtedly find yourself sitting back and admiring your work. Of course, you’ll spend so much time drinking the beer you won’t actually admire anything distinguishable. Plus the beer that was supposed to give you liquid courage is actually making the balancing act on the scaffold more dangerous than you previously thought possible. Slowly get down. Slowly.